DC Comics's The Flash

Gather round, my friends, and allow Jimbo to make a confession in front of God and everyone. I freely admit that I have not, in all ways and at all times, necessarily been the biggest fan of superhero movies in the DCEU. This is for reasons that should be fairly obvious to anyone who knows my taste in movies: The DC heroes tend to be broody and boring. The scripts tend to have been written to suck the life out of the audience so that it can be used to clean the toilets. The punch lines aren't funny. The characters aren't believable as people (and no, I don't expect a scientific explanation for why Superman can fly. I just want him to act in a matter that makes sense most of the time and to have a reason for why he doesn't at other times.) or that they try to put too much in (my nickname at one place I used to work was Green Lantern and even I thought that the GL movie was subpar) but with 2023's The Flash I can happily (ish) report that it rates a solid "Meh."

Seriously, the story was pretty decently written. I mean, the whole "The Flash lost the Speed Force" thing was okay, and it makes sense that he would try to get it back. The whole multiverse thing is a well established trope for a reason and it was explained by Bruce Wayne about as well as possible, given that he wasn't talking to a twenty-first century geek from the real Earth that would just understand it because it's so commonly used by so many authors. I mean, the plot evolved in a more or less organic manner and was easy enough to follow. Even the one guy who took things WAY TOO FAR had a valid reason for doing what he did and I can't say I'd have acted any differently than he did given his abilities. 

The acting was okay and, although I wasn't really a big fan of Michael Keaton as Batman the first time around, it was still nostalgic in a weird sort of way. Ezra Miller was really good as both versions of Barry Allen. The only DC movie I've really liked was Wonder Woman and so it should come as no surprise that I enjoyed Gal Gadot reprising the role. Part of my dislike for DC movies in general started in the early 80s when, even as a small boy...

(Jimbo ducks behind both concealment and cover and calls for close air support and probably a dust-off.)

Christopher Reeve couldn't sell me on his version of Superman circa the early 80s. That was  when I was watching the Super Friends and Justice League cartoons and trying to talk my mom into buying me comics at the grocery store and before I was old enough to ride my bike to the comic shop. Still, those movies were kind of painful to watch and, to this day, I'd rather watch a DC cartoon than a live action movie. Even my ex-wife got that. She used to buy me DC cartoons on DVD for Christmas. True story.

And both cuts of Justice League still sucked, Zach Snyder be damned. 

I will give The Flash this much: The fight scenes were excellent and, given the powers of the characters involved, believable. Seriously, there's not a whole lot more impressive than the ability of someone moving at faster than the speed of light to apply an asswhooping. I love the way they slow things down. It really does remind me of the way things look in the comics at times, with Barry able to basically stop and think while moving at a quadrillion miles a second.

Well, give or take, anyway. Just work with me.

The special effects were pretty awesome as well, but somebody help me out here: I've seen too much of this lately. Why are movie studios spending all of this money on special effects when they'd do better saving themselves tens of millions in special effects and spending a couple million extra for a decent writer? Or, and I know this is straight sacrilege...

But has DC ever though of hiring a lifelong comic fan as a director instead of some goofball who just doesn't get what fans love about comics? Of course, there are plenty of fans of Trek and Wars wondering the same thing about the people helming the properties in their universes as well. 

But I'm digressing.

Seriously, if all you want from a film is awesome visuals and cool fight scenes you can get that from The Flash all day long. Watch that movie on a loop, guy, because it's here and it's great.

I may have missed a trick or two here because I've never really been a fan of The Flash as a solo comic as I have been of super groups he's been in, but I will say they didn't screw too much up that I could see. Like Barry Allen is Barry Allen except where he's not because he's not intended to be. If you don't get that watch the movie. 

And, on the script front, I have to give it this much: Barry does at least take the chance to do something we'd all do if we could. I mean, I can't and the real world doesn't work that way, but damned if I wouldn't have the second I figured out that I could. That much of the movie I felt in a way that I really wish I wouldn't have.

At the end of the day, I'm glad I got a chance to watch The Flash. I can't say that about most DC movies I've seen. It's just that there are times when the movie feels like it was outlined by a world class writer and had the details added by a freshman writing major at a commuter college. This movie tried really hard. But hey, I'm pretty sure I got a quick glance of the Golden Age Flash at one point, so that was cool. Watch for it. Tell me if I'm right.

Bottom Line: 3.75 out of 5 Thunderbolts

The Flash
Andy Muschietti
DC Comics, 2023

Some products related to The Flash are available at the links below. If you click the links and buy literally anything from Amazon, I get a small percentage at no additional cost to you.

DC's Wonder Woman Starring Gal Gadot

(*SIGH* Before I get into the fun  part, especially with this being a DC Comics related post, I have to share my thoughts on the passing of Adam West. I want to cry. I've been a fan of his since before I can remember. One of the local independent TV stations used to carry Batman episodes back to back on weekends. I've always loved them. So Godspeed Adam West. That's another piece of my childhood gone.)

(I got to go with my kiddos! Check us out in our 3D glasses!)

For the longest time I've been a DC movie hater. Seriously. I'm guilty. I will admit to a bit of an obsession with Wonder Woman though. I watched the live action TV series in re-runs as a kid. I loved the Super Friends/ Justice League cartoon. I haven't watched a Batman movie since the Clinton Administration. I'm a blatant Green Lantern fanboy but I was disappointed by the GL movie. For whatever reason, though they go this one right. And not just a little right. Wonder Woman was everything I wanted the GL movie to be and more.

I'll be honest in stating that I was a bit disappointed that the movie was set in World War One as opposed to World War Two, when Wonder Woman's birth took place in the comics. I'm not a true hardcore purist but I do have enough purist tendencies that I was  bit annoyed with such a massive change in timing. That lasted about ten minutes into the movie. I don't want to give too many spoilers but the story just worked.

Wonder Woman has always been a story with one half based on Greek myth and the other based on the real world. The movie exemplified that. When  you've got an invasion of the island of Themyscira  by the German army (the World War I version, not the Nazis) it can't be anything else. German troops are from the  real world. Themyscira is from myth. Poison gas is (horrifyingly) from the real world. Ares, God of War, is from Greek Myth. I could go on. There is a point here though:

The Wonder Woman mythos has always depended on the ability of the writer to blend the two worlds well and here they've done it flawlessly. The blend is seamless. I'd say they transition back and forth well, but the bottom line is that there is no need for the TO transition. They two are straight up blended. The writers did a wonderful job with this script. There are no two ways about it.

Oh, and another thing: If Wonder Woman doesn't win the Oscar for best special effects someone needs their ass kicked. Someone as in, like, the entire Academy. If there is a problem finding someone to do it, I will volunteer as tribute. Everything about this film looks gorgeous, from the Lasso of Truth, to the explosions, to the poison gas, the costuming, everything. The fight between Diana and her target is epic. I hate to say it, but I'm almost wondering if they stole some people from Marvel because this movie is beautiful.

Of course the true key to any adaptation of Wonder Woman is the title character herself and Gal Gadot knocks it out of the park. She is Diana, Princess of Themyscira. She has the look and the personality just right. The only actor I've ever seen play a super hero this well previously is Robert Downey Jr. Yup, you heard it hear first: Gadot plays Wonder Woman as a well as Downey plays Tony Stark. Coming from me, that's high praise indeed.

Granted, Diana grew up on an island where she was the only child and there were no men. She does not have a working knowledge of modern society because she didn't grow up in it. The first time she sees a baby she marks out but it all makes sense. She wasn't raised in a normal environment and so she isn't used to normal things. Gadot plays this part of her character to a t and I'm wondering how she did it.

Of course, a good Steve Trevor always helps as well and Chris Pine nails it. He plays the perfect soldier: The mission means everything. All else is secondary. He falls in love with Diana and makes you believe it. He's got the cocky thing down (and Trevor is both a pilot and a spy, therefore making him cocky as hell) but he's level headed enough to wish he didn't have to fight and he makes you believe all of it. Very few actors will ever fit into a role they way Gadot does in this one, but he comes close.

Any story is improved with a good villain and Wonder Woman delivers those in spades. Whether it's Ares, Greek God of War, a German general who wants the war to continue, to the evil Dr. Maru inventor of a horrifying chemical weapon that can destroy gas masks (and also a woman with a career in STEM) there are plenty of people to root against. It's always good to see the protagonist win, but it's even better when you want to see the bad guys lose. Oh, and speaking of women in Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics:

I've heard a lot of debate about whether or not Wonder Woman is a feminist movie. Consider the following quote:

"You are stronger than you believe and more powerful than you know" - Antiope to a young Diana Prince

Consider the fact that Diana does things her way, places her mission over the mission of the men she is with (albeit while ultimately believing that her mission is more important and will complete the mens mission for them.) and completes it by defeating a man. Consider the fact that she is expected to fail and succeeds anyway. This is a woman who takes her own counsel, who does not back down when confronted by anything and who does not let anything deter her from her path. Diana is a woman who kills a Greek god using only her own innate power. In short, this is a feminist film.

Yes, I've heard the complaints that Wonder Woman is not a true feminist because she is a straight white woman and in good shape, but check facts: It is not necessary to be a fat lesbian person of color to be a feminist. I'm not generally a fan of expecting kids to find their role models in the entertainment industry, but if my girls go that route I want them to watch this movie and see something to emulate. Yes, this is the message I want all young girls everywhere to hear: You can be what you want, do what you want and achieve anything with or without a man.

It's worth noting that both of my daughters loved this movie so much that they thanked me for taking them when we went on Saturday, then again when I saw them on Sunday and again when I saw them today. My youngest was a bit scared of the poison gas scenes (Honestly, so was I. I've read about what that crap can do.) and even the older of the two called them "creepy". They're both kind of right but this movie wouldn't work if it was all wine and roses.

My only complaint her is kind of lame, but I'm going to put it out there anyway. This is an awesome film. It needs a sequel. I'm not sure where they left room for one though. The main villain is deader than disco. His two accomplices have been wiped out. There is no unfinished business. Dammit, I want another Wonder Woman movie. DC better figure this out and get me one. You finally got one right DC. Follow up. And for the sake of all of your fans PLEASE use the same writer and director. You can still screw the next one up. I would prefer if you didn't.

Bottom Line: 5.0 out of 5 Bullet Proof Bracelets

Wonder Woman
DC Entertainment, 2017

Some Wonder Woman related merchandise is available at the links below: