Tuesday, May 15, 2018

Marvel's Avengers: Infinity War

Nope. Not bitter. Not me. Never. I don't get bitter. Not even if my cousin promises to go see Avengers: Infinity War with me. Not even if he does it twice.  Not even when I get spoiled because his tall ass didn't go see it with me. I could never be bitter. I'm Sweet of the Sweet and Innocent Twins. (Inside joke. There are two people on the entire planet who get that and I'm pretty sure that the other one doesn't read my blog. You should be laughing though. Trust me.) So, my not bitter self went and took in the movie by myself. And believe me,  Avengers: Infinity War delivered.

I'm going to try not to spoil much, but it's not going to be easy. There is a lot to this movie and it's an emotional roller coaster. I usually talk about my emotional reactions here but A:IW jerked me in a few different directions. It's weird. One of my friends did a Facebook post complaining that her anxiety ramped steadily upward throughout the whole movie. She was right. Things go from bad to worse to worst.

I'm going to start my review by mentioning the end of the movie. If I were capable of being bitter, I just might be a bit bitter about this ending. This movie is the culmination of an eighteen movie storyline. It is the movie equivalent of a crossover event in comics. I won't say exactly how the flick ends, but I will say this: This plays like a three act play, but it ends at the conclusion of the second act. Things can't get any worse. This isn't even a cliffhanger ending. It's like a fall off of a cliff, only it's going to last for a year until the next movie comes. I don't like cliffhangers but this is worse. It's crazy.

Other than the ending (and the strong desire I developed to slap both Dr. Strange and Starlord) though, Avengers: Infinity War was epic. This thing moved. There was always something going on. It was crazy. I've heard others complain that there was too much crammed in but I disagree. I mean, if you're into boring cry-fest chick flicks then okay, there is probably too much going on here. Go feel some angst and bite your fingernails off while watching two teens make eyes at each other over the tops of overpriced milkshakes. If you're a fan of good SF/F and you like movies that take hold of your attention and refuse to let go, watch this movie.

I find myself liking Thanos as a villain. Something that most authors forget is that we're all the hero of our own story. Thanos is out to murder half of all intelligent life in the universe. He's an evil piece of trash. In his own mind though, he's doing the survivors a favor.  Less people means less draw on resources and therefore more for everyone. Basically, he displays a knowledge of economics matched by a third grader with conservative parents or your average adult Marxist. (Hint: Economic growth requires population growth and a modern economy suddenly deprived of half its people would be a complete disaster that would most likely cause the deaths of many more when production and distribution of necessities went to shit.) Thomas Robert Malthus would be proud of Thanos, even while he wondered how the human population was still so high and had the lowest percentage of starving and  illiterate people in the history of humanity. That much being said, committed Communists really do believe that they have the best system.

I will always and forever be a fan of any movie where Robert Downey, Jr. plays Tony Stark. Avengers: Infinity War</> is no exception. RDJ doesn't just _play_ Tony Stark. RDJ _is_ Tony Stark. He's lived the high society, womanizing, heavy drinking lifestyle. You can see it in his portrayal. He knocks it out of the park every time. I seriously wrote this dude off at one point and now I feel like a turd. His comeback has been remarkable and I applaud him. Keep making movies, guy. I'll keep watching.

Tom Holland also makes an awesome Spider-Man. You can feel the teen-aged desire to do big person things in him. He's a believer in his mission and he seriously wants to fit in. He's a boy in a man's world but he wants to be a man. He's working to prove his manhood and assert his independence. I like this kid. I love the fact that he won't give up. I love the fact that he won't listen to anybody. I love the fact that he's still there when common sense would have told him to give up. And I love the fact that Tom Holland makes me believe it all. He's got the wild-eyed look to make this character work.

Zoe Saldana as Gamora is impressive as well. She grew up raised by a maniac and she knows it. She hates him. She hates what he did to her people. She fights against it with everything she has. When Gamora looks at Thanos, we can feel her disgust along with her. When she gets taken, we can feel her fear. When Thano (spoilers!) throws her off the cliff to gain the Soul Stone, we all want to kick his ass. It's because Zoe Saldana makes her character live and breathe. Kudos to her.

Some of the actions the heroes don't make sense. Starlord, in particular, deserves to have his nose broke in seventeen different places. Dr. Strange may have an adequate excuse for his stupidity. He saw the future and can tell what comes next. So maybe he gets a pass. Possibly. I'll get back with you next movie. The good part about the stupidity though, is that human beings frequently do stupid stuff. Starlord reacts out of emotion when logic is needed. Guess what? He's a (half) human being. Humans do stupid things out of emotion constantly. Out irrationality is part of what makes us human. Tony Stark was stupid to try to get rid of Peter Parker. He didn't want to see the kid get hurt. Stark didn't want to risk the kid's life even though, logically, he needed the help. This is known as good writing.

All in all, I loved this movie. I'm going to own it someday. I've seen some hate for this movie, but you won't find it here. Marvel put on a clinic here. They built this thing over years and did an awesome job with the first half of their movie. I can't wait to see the conclusion of it next summer.

Bottom Line
4.75 out of 5 Infinity Stones
Avengers Infinity War is available for pre-order at the following link:

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